What's in a name?

Why the name, Donkeys Fly Far for your blog? The answer, my friend, is because it is just not true. In fact, it is a blatant lie. Just ask these kindly fellows, Hamel and Jerome who gave it a shot.

Notice how the Donkey in the photo is no where near flight. In actuality, the Donkey is nearly perpendicular to the ground and probably really uncomfortable. In fact on a scale from 1 to Flight, this Donkey is in Jersey. Contrary to popular beliefs held when under the influence of LSD, shrooms or opium, I can assure you that none of the 44 million donkeys on the planet Fly at all. Not even a little bit. Not even a baby flight. Not even a fall out of the nest for the first time and try to fly while falling kind of flight. Nothing. When asked what the closest thing to the ground is, 9 out of 10 English speaking Evangelical Christians will say, Donkeys.

More than that, the phrase Donkeys Fly Far sounds like something a baby would say. Take some of the most powerful IT and Web companies in the world's names: Google, Yahoo, Twitter, Bebo, Fonolo, Meebo, YouNoodle, Squido or Dimdim. These company names sound suspiciously similar to the Vietnamese menu I just looked at online, but more than that, they have an eerie semblance to the GooGoo GaGas of babies. Is this a coincidence? Have the most powerful companies in the world been named by babies? Or is this just sheer marketing genius?

People’s attraction to names like Google and Yahoo, seem to be an extension of our culture's simultaneous love of youth and fear of death. What better symbol for youth than that of a baby?

Studies have been done for centuries on people's opinions of Babies. As you can see via the following clickable graph, BabyMade and BabyProduced, almost 90% of people absolutely LOVE babies:

While only a measly 10% Hate them. Of the ten percent of baby haters, 9.6 % can

be found on the “We Hate Babies, We Really Do” blog and the other .4% can be found reading the "Unemployment Makes me Hate babies (and probably other small, cute things)" blog and all have mysteriously contracted Swine Flu recently.

Fortunately, I do not cater my marketing techniques to soulless baby hating bastards and instead rely on following the soulless money grubbing tycoons of Capitalism that would just as soon kill my baby in order to make a profit. It was once said that, killing an Instinct is like killing a baby. What if you're instinct is to kill a baby?

Take a look at the old man in the photo below. Look at his wrinkled brow. His squinty eyes. All terrifying reminders of death. Forget about the fact that he is chewing on my kitten.

Thus, Donkeys Fly Far is adhering to the standard that this man is just another reminder of death and babies are better.